Monday, September 28, 2009

9 weeks

So today our lil Pea graduated from an Embryo to a Fetus!! It still is very surreal to me that there is this little being growing rapidly inside of me. I still am having bloating, indigestion and the lovely mostly constant nausea. The nausea has actually been a little worse the last two days. Which is fine with me. As much as I hate the feeling, I am actually grateful for it. I know that may sound weird to some, but to me it let's me know that hopefully it's because lil Pea is growing stronger and bigger every day.
On a different subject one of my fellow blogger friends, JENNIFER , just received some very sad news. When she went for her 9 week scan Friday her baby no longer had a heartbeat. This is now her 4th miscarriage. I feel so sorry for her and her family. Please keep them in your thoughts and prayers as I am.
This also makes me realize how quickly things can go wrong. As much as we have made it past such a hurdle already, I still realize how something could still happen. We are so in love with our lil Pea and I just can't even let myself think too much about the grief we would feel at this point if something happened. Also knowing how long it took us this time to even get PG. I still have that nasty nagging feeling that is in the back of my head telling me my body cannot make healthy babies and that we might still lose this one. I even think sometimes maybe the drugs are just prolonging the inevitable. But then I think maybe my body just really wasn't ready those two other times. Or maybe some of my eggs aren't the best but the reason it took so long to get PG this time is because somehow my body knew to wait until that "perfect" egg came along that would be our beautiful baby soon. And I have to think this is it as not to drive myself totally insane.
I wish we were going to see our lil Pea this week. You don't know how bad I want to call my dr and say I just can't wait until next week! But I am grateful he at least mentioned I can come in at 10 weeks again instead of waiting until 12 weeks. So until then I will try to patiently wait until next week to see our lil Pea. I think maybe I will have a little sigh of relief if everything is still going good next week and we see our lil Pea and a still perfect heartbeat. And by 12 weeks I have promised myself I will truly start to have fun with this PG. Maybe even go out and buy a little baby book or toy or something!
Until then we continue to pray lil Pea stays strong and continues to grow into our healthy baby we hope to meet in 31 weeks. (or 30 is fine also =))

8 comments:

  1. Sending you some good thoughts for next week!

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  2. Yeah for 9 weeks!! I pray you keep growing strong little baby, you have a lot of people out here praying and waiting for you!

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  3. keeping lil' pea in my prayers...I know the feeling of holding your breath all too well -- but this is great progress and you will get to that point where buying that toy or that first book sooner than you think :) I have a good feeling about this lil' pea..

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  4. 9 weeks already?? I'm sure it doesn't seem like it's gone as fast for you! Can't wait to hear how the baby is doing next week!

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  5. This is so exciting! I'm so happy for you and that everything is moving along perfectly! I'm sorry to hear about your blogging bud, she is in my prayers.

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  6. Hi love, I have something I want to say... and you will understand (with both of our mom's having dealt with cancer and with Matt's father passing...)....
    After reading this last blog I want you to know this and I believe it with all my heart:
    God only gives us what we can handle and everything happens for a reason. Whether it is to make us stronger or prepare us for what is to come, it's all in his plan. So don't worry or focus on what you could have done differently..(I know that is something that is hard for you to hear but...) It's all his plan and everything will fall into place how it is supposed to be.
    We love you both. xoxo
    I want you to listen to this song our friend Mike played it at Matt's dad's memorial and also at our friend's Elena's (she was his fiance)...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Rb77-GR5EY

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  7. I am so happy to hear everything is going good with your little pea. Thank you for your kind words. It is a hard time for me right now. But know I am praying for you and your little pea. I just wish my story was going the same way and my little pea was still with us.

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